Bawdy Language

A sexual reference book like no other
Everything you always wanted to do but were afraid to say

Dr. Bawdy's counseling is wholly provided for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for qualified medical advice from a licensed healthcare professional. If you're dumb enough to take it, you'll just have to suffer the consequences.

Side effects may include bloated retina, collapsed vagina, anal rash, nasal drip, and double vision. Contact an emergency room psychologist for an erection lasting longer than 20 seconds.

Any further questions regarding individual circumstances should be directed towards your general practitioner/pharmacist/veterinarian. As to any contemplated legal action, tell your lawyer that Dr. Bawdy says he should simply "Fuck off!"

Dear Dr. Bawdy,

Masturbation has me confused. Is it self-pleasure or self-abuse? And why do people talk about the price you’ll have to pay for doing it? How much exactly is it? I live on a limited budget.

— Whacked Out, Bradford, ME

doctor Bawdy advicedoctor Bawdy advice

Dear Whacked Out,
Not to worry your little head about it — whichever mood you’re in creates the moment. For most of us, it’s a little bit of each. As to the price, that’s completely up to you—spend as little or as much as you like.

Looking for more sound advice? Dr. Write Dr. Bawdy with your problems. Bawdy is the world's foremost authority on sex—says he.

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