Bawdy Language

A sexual reference book like no other
Everything you always wanted to do but were afraid to say

Dr. Bawdy's counseling is wholly provided for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for qualified medical advice from a licensed healthcare professional. If you're dumb enough to take it, you'll just have to suffer the consequences.

Side effects may include bloated retina, collapsed vagina, anal rash, nasal drip, and double vision. Contact an emergency room psychologist for an erection lasting longer than 20 seconds.

Any further questions regarding individual circumstances should be directed towards your general practitioner/pharmacist/veterinarian. As to any contemplated legal action, tell your lawyer that Dr. Bawdy says he should simply "Fuck off!"

It’s not unusual to insult people by identifying them with their body parts. Calling someone a prick is a commonplace insult, but we reserve use of the expression for males of a particular character, and not for men in general. Cunt, on the other hand, is not only a term filled with contempt and disdain, but it is applied indiscriminately, regardless of the person’s character, insulting not only the person toward whom the remark is aimed, but all women everywhere.


Words Fail

Man has not only spoken ill of the cunt but has also described it in glowingly romantic terms. According to Karen Horney, the noted psychiatrist, this makes very good sense. Both approaches reflect man’s deep-seated dread of the female genitalia; each in a different way helps allay this fear. By making little of the cunt, he convinces himself that there is nothing to fear from so mean an object. Through its idealization he insures the unlikelihood of harm from so divine a being.

And we have no shortage of superlatives to describe it. We have everything from the dearest bodily part (Shakespeare) to the best part (Earl of Dorset), the best in Christendom (Rochester), and la belle chose (Chaucer). For some, it’s been just plain out of this world — as in heaven (18thC).



Yet that  nagging  fear  is always  there  beneath the  surface. It’s also  been  sheer hell  (18thC)  and  a  devilish thing  (18thC);  so much  so that  many  would  dispense with the  entire  matter by put- ting the Devil into  hell  (18thC).

Some  reserved judgment, as  did  John  Donne with  the  best- worst part. Others  extolled  it as a masterpiece and  featured it prominently as  the  star  (16thC), depicted ofttimes  as  pretty- pretty  (17thC)  and  indescribably quaint, as in Chaucer’s “Miller’s Tale”: “Full prively he caught her by the queinte.”3

At its lowest,  this cloven stamp of female distinction (18thC) has  been  reduced to a suck-and-swallow, a man  (or fool)  trap, a butter  boat,  an oystercracker, and  sperm-sucker (19thC). At the same  time, it’s been  elevated to a position of power as the control- ling  part (19thC)  and  the regulator (late 18thC–19thC).

It’s almost  as though they forgot its more mundane functions as the  water  box  (19thC), or streamstown (c. 1820–90), the  gener- ating  or brat-getting place (19thC), the nursery, and  the bath  of birth (early 20thC).

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