Bawdy Language

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S-H-I-T. It is probably the most popular word in the English language and responsible for some of our most expressive sentiments. We’ve a shit-load of expressions that capture perfectly the nature of the human condition. Add a simple exclamation point and what better way to register disgust, disappointment, or frustration? It can mean very little — nothing, or the least quality as “This ain’t worth shit.” or represent the very best, as in top quality street drugs: “This is some good shit

It’s everywhere. You’ll find it in the most exotic places — in your pants, alongside a shave, shower, shine, and shampoo, on a stick, and in a handbag (all 20thC). Most people are full of it; those who aren’t simply act shitty. We start the day telling others, “I feel like shit,” eliciting the remark, “You do seem flushed.” Dispassionate observers reinforce the sentiment, noting how you look like shit or like ten pounds of shit in a five pound bag (both 20thC). We pretend not to notice the resemblance.

When you speak of a movement, or sit on a seat,
Have a passage, or stool, or simple excrete;
Or say to the others, “I’m going out back,”
Then groan in pure joy in that smelly old shack.
You can go lay a cable, or do number two,
Or sit on the toidy and make a do-do,
But ladies and men who are socially fit,
Under no provocation will go take a shit!

— “Ode to Those Four-Letter Words”

Read more – “Bawdy Language,” the Book

Christianity has done a great deal for love by making a sin of it.

You might not have guessed it from the Old Testament, but for the Jews, fucking has always been a matter of doing the agree- able (19thC)—no guilt, no pain, no anxiety. Good sex was considered a mitzvah, an exemplary deed. The most pious reserved Friday night for doing it with their wives, choosing the most holy day, the Sabbath, to perform this most sacred and blessed act.

We’re Cross with You

The Christian attitude toward sex, on the other hand, left everything to be desired. It originated with the Church leaders and authorities, who did much to shape and influence future attitudes on the topic.

Before you could say “hellsfire, brimstone, and damnation,” people began feeling guilt. Soon they found themselves doing the naughty (19thC), feeling naughtiness in the pleasure prior to, during, and subsequent to the act.

The medieval Church worked hard to eliminate guilt by simply cutting down on the number of occasions on which one might feel pleasure. It recommended abstinence on Thursdays in memory of the capture of Jesus; on Fridays in memory of his death; on Saturdays in honor of the Virgin Mary; on Sundays in memory of the Resurrection; and on Mondays in commemoration of the departed souls. The act was also forbidden forty days before Pentecost and Christmas, and was never to be performed on special feast days or during Lent. Thus was born the appointment book.

Read more – “Bawdy Language,” the Book

I was walking along this fucking fine morning,
fucking sun fucking shining away,
little country fucking lane,
and I meets up with this fucking girl,
fucking lovely she was,
so we gets into fucking conversation,
and I takes her over a fucking gate into a fucking field,
and we has sexual intercourse.

How to use the “F” word.

Read more – “Bawdy Language,” the Book

As a public service, we delight in sharing with you the origin of the Webster-approved " f-bomb:"

Interesting how we call it a “bomb.” We bomb on exams, dates, and other critical moments in our life which often culminate in either getting drunk or stoned.

When so bombed, we’re out of our mind with often devastating results.

Curiously, these are also the times when the f-bomb is most likely to be dropped. It frequently comes out of the blue—a bombshell of sorts, a term which originally described something unusual and sudden with unpleasant and painful results.

It’s also a “blockbuster,” delivering shattering or surprising news with real repercussions. The original “blockbuster” was a bomb employed during WWII, touted for its ability – you guessed it — to destroy an entire city block. Today it describes major box-office success or a revelation from the campaign trail.

The f-bomb also often heralds the sensational and, when dropped suddenly, can leave considerable devastation in its wake. It’s a great word, one deserving of our respect. Context and tone is everything. Like all other words, it is meant to be used with intelligence and deftness.

Remember dear reader: obscenity, by itself, is the last refuge of the vulgar and the crutch of the inarticulate motherfucker.

A good portion of the following has been drawn from an earlier post at English Language and Usage at Stack Exchange . You can see it in its entirety here

Ever wonder about those asterisks and other bleeping marks used to shield us from those “unpleasant” and “socially unacceptable” words. What are they called? Where the f**k did they come from?

As a social service for the more literate reader s of this blog (You know who you few are), I have done some research on your behalf. You know research. It’s stealing other people’s work and riding their backs to fame and fortune. Meanwhile, the rest of you illiterate, sex-starved readers can simply skip this entry and go on to more salacious material which requires less grey matter.

My humblest and most sincere apologies to the two sites from which I have literally lifted most of the following material; but my loyal man-servant, secretary, and researcher, igor, failed to record the source of the following. But f***k it!. No one really gives a s#*t anyhow. So here goes nothing.

The most term invented in 1980 to describe textual symbols meant to represent profanities is “grawlix/grawlixes”. Other suggestions for the same thing are “obscenicons” or “maledicta”. These refer to e.g. old comic strips in which the dialog bubbles of characters sometime contain expressions like “@#*!%!”, meant to represent a profanity.

The use of typography to censor words was originally used to avoid breaking obscenity laws, when it was blasphemous to make fun of religion. Religious words were censored more than “normal” swear words, and were only censored when used as part of oaths; normal use was unbleeped. Dashes were used to obfuscate throughout the 18th century and asterisks were common from the 19th century on.

Eliminative dashes, as in D–n for Damn can be found as early as 1710 in The Tatler (found via The Anatomy of Swearing (2001) by Ashley Montagu):
D—n you all, for a set of sons of whores; you will stop here to be paid by the hour! … Why, and be d——d to you, do you not drive over that fellow?

Earlier than then Rigby sodomy trial of 1698 is this citation in the OED for shit:
a1687 Duke of Buckingham Instalment in Wks. (1705) II. 88 You’re such a scurvy..Knight, That when you speak a Man wou’d swear you S——te.

Mark Liberman of Language Log searched LION (LIterature ONline) and found Richard Ames’s “A Satyr Again Man”, from Sylvia’s Revenge (1688):
314 Bully how great i’th’ Mouth the Accent sounds;
315 Bully who nothing breaths but Bl—d and W–nds?

The same Language Log post has John Oldham’s poem “Upon the Author of a Play call’d Sodom” from Works (1680):
26 Whence nauseous Rhymes, by filthy Births proceed,
27 As Maggots, in some T—rd, ingendring breed.

Jack Horntip has a fascinating collection of books from the 17th century to today. Several contain typo-bleeping, but it may be that some of them are later (sometimes 19th century) reprints with censoring added at the later time, and the originals may have been uncensored.

The following are all from the Jack Horntip Collection and most only show the raw OCR (plain scanned text). It’s possible they’re from later printings, but from the first pages I get the impression they’re the original typography. However, they could be later, edited, “facsimile” re-printings, as I’m unsure if the years would be written in Roman or Arabic numerals at this time. (These should all be available online in the Early English Books Online database for further verification.)

The earliest that has a full PDF is in Sodom or the Quintessence of Debauchery (1684) by the Earl of Rochester, which is chock full of all sorts of uncensored sexual language but bleeps out “heaven[s]”, “almighty”, “God[s]” (although there’s a single “p—s”), for example:
Al . . . ty Cunts, whom Bolloxinion here

Say what you want, but be careful of the Church!

Mock Songs and Jovial Poems (1675):
You’d find the Perfume,
Almost as strong as it was:
Nay, she had such an Art,
In Letting a F—,
I mean for the Noise and Smell;

Covent Garden Drolery 2nd Ed. (date also shown on the scanned first page):
Now he that sate here had much the better pjace,
He broke not his Neck, though he wetted his Ar—
For by th’ill successive disposure of th’other
Folks saw, and they tumbled too, one o’re another,

Wit Restor’d by John Mennes issued in 1658:
In rythem daigne goddess to accept my verses,
I wis with worse wise men have wip’t their A—
O thou which able art to take to taske all
(Pox! what will rythme to that?) oh, I’me a raskall,

The earliest I found is John Philips’ Sportive Wit (1656) and contains many bleepos. Here’s one poem.
On Tobacco.

When I do smoak my nose with a pipe of Tobacco after a feast,
Then down let I my hose, and with paper do wipe mine — like a beast.
It so doth please my minde,
It doth so ¿ase behinde,
For to wipe,
For to wipe my ¿ewel.
Tobacco’s my delight,
So ‘t is mine to sh —
Oh fine smack,
Oh brave ¿ack my jewel.

Th-th-th-at’s all, folks.

The smallpox epidemic of the 16th-17th century resulted in considerable fallout in the most exotic places, claiming pubic hair among its many victims. Thoroughly embarrassed by their baldness, women fashioned artificial hairpieces known as merkins, a term which had also long been a long-standing name for the female genitalia (you know, the old vee-jay-jay, hoo-hah etc.).

Merkin later made a brief appearance as the name of the President of the Unites States in the film Dr. Strangelove, as Merkin Muffley (which translates loosely as “cunt cunt.”) A curious turnabout, since Presidents have traditionally been seen as pricks rather than cunts. Interesting too that a cunt should be the only voice of restraint and moderation during a time when the world was perched at the brink of nuclear destruction.

Currently, the only epidemic raging appears to be one of consumerism and general madness. And for m’lady who has everything including a fine bikini wax, the genius of American marketing, having successfully removed her hair, now offers it back to her to at a special price. And you know what you she can do with it.

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Rape continues to be in the news lately. So it’s incumbent on us to say a few words about it.

Let’s begin with a few hard facts.

"Rape" is not very user-friendly. It’s not the kind of word you use in mixed conversation or bring home to mother. Though it is probably the most potent and incendiary of the four letter words, it has neither appeared on a list of banned words, nor has it ever been bleeped from the media. The Supreme Court has OK'd its use, even in a crowded theater.

It's also a rigid motherfucker — noncompliant to the whims of its user and highly inflexible in its meaning. It doesn't give the user much wiggle room in its employment. Like Horton, the word means what it says and says what it means.

Rape does not have any of the enterprising spirit or the freewheeling nature of, say, the word "fuck." Now that's a word that is not only incredibly pliant and playful but one with the ability to convey a variety of sentiments by a mere shift in intonation. Rape should only have it so good.

Fuck's Versatility:

I'll take fuck any day over rape. How better to describe the current discussion about rape, than "outfuckingrageous?"

Doctor C. Bawdy