Bawdy Language

You Name IT

The Female Privates, That Is

The portions of a woman that appeal to man’s depravity

Are constructed with considerable care,

And what at first appears to be a simple little cavity

Is in fact a most elaborate affair.

Physicians of distinction have examined these phenomena

In numerous experimental dames;

They have tabulated carefully the feminine abdomina,

And given them some fascinating names.

There’s the vulva, the vagina, and the jolly perineum,

And the hymen, in the case of many brides,

And lots of other little things you’d like, if you could see ’em,

The clitoris, and other things besides.

So isn’t it a pity, when we common people chatter

Of these mysteries to which I have referred,

That we use for such a delicate and complicated matter

Such a very short and ordinary word.

—Anon., cited by Peter Freyer,

“It” in Mrs. Grundy, 1963