Bawdy Language

You Name IT

The Female Privates, That Is

The portions of a woman that appeal to man’s depravity

Are constructed with considerable care,

And what at first appears to be a simple little cavity

Is in fact a most elaborate affair.

Physicians of distinction have examined these phenomena

In numerous experimental dames;

They have tabulated carefully the feminine abdomina,

And given them some fascinating names.

There’s the vulva, the vagina, and the jolly perineum,

And the hymen, in the case of many brides,

And lots of other little things you’d like, if you could see ’em,

The clitoris, and other things besides.

So isn’t it a pity, when we common people chatter

Of these mysteries to which I have referred,

That we use for such a delicate and complicated matter

Such a very short and ordinary word.

—Anon., cited by Peter Freyer,

“It” in Mrs. Grundy, 1963

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A few years ago a story made the rounds of a young woman in a bikini who was bathing in the surf when a particularly violent wave hit her and swept off the top of her bathing suit.

To avoid embarrassment, she embraced her nakedness with both arms.

As she was making her way to shore, a young boy stopped her and innocently inquired, “Lady, those sure are cute little puppies. You suppose I could have the one with the pink nose?”

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According to Wickipedia, St. Priapus Church (French: Église S. Priape) is a North American religion founded in the 1980s that centers on the worship of the phallus. Founded in Montreal Quebec by D. F. Cassidy, the church has a following mainly among gay men in Canada and the United States.

The church, which is named after the Greek god Priapus, teaches that the phallus is the source of life, beauty, joy, and pleasure.The phallus is to be worshipped through a variety of sexual acts, including group masturbation. Semenis also treated with reverence and its consumption is an act of worship.

Priapus

That’s not apparently what the Christian Science Church in Dixon Illinois had in mind when it was recently renovated. It all looks pretty innocent at eye-level; the closer you get to heaven, however, (thanks to Google-Earth) the more is revealed its true essence.

Aerial View

The Church’s stated mission is about unconditional love, spiritual growth and healing based on the Bible, Christ Jesus’ teachings, and the writings of Mary Baker Eddy. Sexologists wonder, however, whether there’s more there than meets the eye. The Church’s motto is “Always Rising.” The sermon for November 7 was, “Who told you that you were naked?”

Ground View and Proposed solution on Church’s Facebook Page

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It wasn’t until  1971,  in The Owl and  the Pussycat  that  Barbara Streisand became the  first female  superstar to  say  fuck  in  a major  motion picture. Off the  set,  however, its use  was  commonplace. During  the  filming of The  Prince and  the  Showgirl  (1957),  Laurence Olivier chided Marilyn  Monroe for constantly arriving  late,  asking her,  “Why  can’t  you  get  here  on  time  for fuck’s  sake?”  To which  she  replied, “Oh  do  they  have  that  word  in  England too?”

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Enjoy new Bawdy Crossword every Monday.